Getting Your House in Order

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

On today's episode, Financial expert and Amazon best-selling author John Browning talks with Bob Kabacy where we discuss his new book "About Me - Information You Will Need When I Have Passed" robertkabacy.com/During this short podcast you will learn not only about the importance of getting your house in order beyond the typical estate planning but also about the perspective of;1. The wonderful gift you are creating for your family2. How to avoid analysis paralysis3. Practical tips on how and why to just get startedNothing in this communication should be construed as personal advice and past performance is no guarantee of future results. Investing is not appropriate for everyone. There is a risk of loss associated with investing in the markets. No representation or implication is being made that using any methodology or system will generate profits or ensure freedom from losses. Guardian Rock LLC and its affiliates are fiduciary investment advisors. Please consult with us or another experienced, investment advisor before making investment decisions and/or trying to implement the strategies and tactics we discuss in any of our publications. Learn more when you Connect with John by texting "LIFE" to 21000 or GuardianRockWealth.com.

Welcome to the build your life podcast with John Browning. Build your life as a relaxed and unedited conversation with financial expert and number one Amazon bestselling author, John Browning. John is the founder of Guardian Rock Wealth and serves clients across the United States. John's the author of the book build a life, not a portfolio, a guide to your financial future based on your personal values, which you can purchase on Amazon, or stay around to the end of today's show and I'll tell you how to get a free copymailed right to your door. I'm Michael Delon, your host for the next few minutes as we chat with financial expert and business owner John Browning. Hell Lord, everybody, this is John Browning with building your life and uh, I have a special guest here with me today. Michael Delon, has has taken the day off again. We're gonna have to get on that guy. You know what it seems to be taking a few days off. It's taking time off with his family, which is something that we're going to talk about today with Bob Kobasi, and we're gonna talk about his book about me and Bob. I'm really happy to have you on the podcast I think you're talking about a very important and often overlooked because it's just easy not to think about it. So I'm really happy to have you, know, on the on the podcast today. I'd love for you to talk about your new book, just came out March Yeo. So what first of all, what made you think about, you know, writing the book? Why did you write it and sort of why should we care? Right? And then also make sure and let us know how. First of all, what's the best way to get in contact with you? Okay, best way to get in touch with me about the book is through Robert Kubisi Dot Com. You can also send me an email at our Kabasi at Kel run K E L R U N DOT COM. That's my law firm UM email, but Robert Kobas dot com. And then you can also pick it up at beyond word dot COM. And then Amazon has it as well if you just type in about me and the search engine. Very Good, and Cabasi spelled K A B A C Y. Right, Yep, you got it. You got it, and everyone, I think any regular listener out there, knows how to get in touch with me. You can text the word life to one and you can find uh, my book building your life, not just a portfolio, on Amazon dot com, or go out to Guardian Rock Wealth Dot Com and click the contact button. I'll be happy to get you a copy of that and always willing to chat at any point in time. But, BOB, why did you write this book? When? What is it about? Me? Sure, let me give you a little bit of background. So I've been wanting to be a lawyer since I was a young child and and explored a number of different fields and with my psychology degree in economics and math miners and background, estate planning really was a good fit for me. And one of the things I've learned doing the estate planning practice since about is that a lot of people don't talk about this topic or even plan for it. In fact, the statistics indicate that about seven out of ten people don't do any form of planning. Um. I had a very personal experience that that that really got me to write this book, and that was about twenty years ago. My mother came to me and indicated that she had stage four cancer and that she did not have a long time to live and that I was to do her estate plan at the time. So we did her estate plan, but I also realized that there was a number of things that I didn't know about her. who was her doctor, where her important papers were kept, bank accounts, all the stuff...

...that I needed to know about to administer her estate I didn't know. So I sat down and put everything into a three ring binder just so I had it after she passed. Well, she ended up passing from the cancer and I got the three ring binder out in the estate plan out and what I didn't realize was the brain fog that sets in when you lose a loved one. Loss creates creates havoc with your system, both physically and mentally, and having that three ring binder really helped me. And it got me thinking, if I'm in an estate planner trained in this field and I'm struggling following the death of a loved one with information and what I need to do, how are other people getting through it? So I thought about formalizing that three ring binder and that's how about me came about, which is a book that's divided in to three sections. The First Section is a customizable section. How do the loved ones you leave behind get into your phone? What's your password? For your computer. Where all your important documents? Who's your financial advisor? WHO's your doctor? What medications do you have? What to do with your pets? What do you want at your funeral? Who shouldn't be at your funeral? All of the things that that you need to know about, and it's very customizable. You just right right in the book. The Second Section are chapters that talk about how to administer in a state. What is probate, what taxes are involved, how to handle grief or what if a dispute arizes, because the other thing I found is you can be busy during the day making phone calls and administering the estate, interacting with bankers and advisors, but then around six, five, six o'clock comes around and it gets quiet and you're still grieving. Grieving goes on seven, even though the world shuts down. So those chapters give a sense of control and that you can learn and you can plan for the next day and get that sense of control and an uncontrollable environment. Then the third part of the book is our resources, like websites, telephone members. That are all helpful. So it's kind of a one stop resource what to do when your loved one passes. Yeah, and you know it's some things you just mentioned are fascinating. Right. It's like, how do you get into your phone? Right, how do you shut off bill? Pay? SHUT OFF BILL PECK? Right, exactly right. And why do you think it is? I mean, you have a really interesting background. I have a minor in psychology as well, but that, I think, really adds to your ability to identify with folks, in addition to your own personal experience. But but talk just the little bit about I mean, it's a nuts and bolts book. I I looked through the book and the great thing about it is it is extremely practical and it's all the things that you don't think about right. Right, or do you want to think about them? It's so important to think about them in advance. Yes, because there's no time. That's that's correct. When someone passes away, it's not like you're going to see them next week again and can ask them questions. So this book is not a substitute for an estate plan. I want to make clear that you still should consult with your lawyer and your financial advisors to get an estate plan, a legal estate plan, and legal documents like a will or a trust, powers of attorney, healthcare directives. You still need to get those in order. This is a companion with all the practical, non legal stuff that someone needs to know about you, and...

...it's those things, those little details, that can trip up the administration. So having them in one spot that's easy to access makes the administration process so much better. It's a great gift to leave to your loved ones so that you know everything's going to happen the way you want it to. Yeah, and and it's uh, it'll save you so much, so much time and so much of the X, I'll call it, the extra grief, of sort of the not knowing and trying to figure out what what is, what isn't, where to go and all of that. It's just super practical, which is why I really appreciated reading the book and I learned a few things myself, as I always do when I read a good book. But, Um, tell me a little bit about I mean, you said like the getting into your phone was like I really really struck on their because I probably, I think my wife knows how to get into my phone, but my wife and I are often together. If something were to happen both of us an accident, that would be the only person that would have any idea how to get into any of my accounts. Right. Well, exactly, and filling this out with a loved one, like a spouse or a child is a really good idea in some cases. For example, I filled this out with my wife and one of the interesting things that occurred was even after that, we're going to be married twenty five years this year, but even after five years of marriage, she answered the questions in a particular way and I looked at her and said, I didn't know you wanted that. She says, well, yeah, we never talked about it. So it brings up some concepts about what people want in a very safe environment. Let's be honest, none of us like talking about death. It's a lost situation, it causes grief. We don't like talking about it. But when you address it in sort of a third person, I'm leaving you a gift sort of manner, and here's the information you need to know just in case something happens to me. That's what this is about. So well, that language and communication is so important right. It's like this is this is my death plan. Well, that that's not okay, but this is my this is my gift to you, because it really is a gift to your per heirs, to your family too, so that they do not have to worry about it, think about it. They can do what needs to be done and do it quickly, efficiently. And one of the things that that we struggle with in my side of the business, which is more on the comprehensive wealth planning, which includes this. But like right now, while we're recording this, and this is not going to change years from now, right we're still gonna need this, this message. But right now in particular, it's two thousand twenty two. The marketplace has been going down, it seems like almost every day and for those that didn't have a plan or didn't, Um I. Didn't think through their plan really well, their plans are falling apart and they're wanting to not stick with the plan. But if you you had a solid plan in place before catastrophe struck and you stick with that and you knew what you were going to do, if and when, because the market always goes down. Death always happens, tax has always happened. There are certain things that just they always happened at some point. You didn't have that plan in place, you begin to panic and then you had nothing to go back to that was written down, that you knew. Okay, we said this like six months ago, before there was quite so much emotion involved and before that sort...

...of took over. We do need emotion in decision making, right, we absolutely need it, but when there's too much of emotion and there's not enough balance of that logic and practicality, we tend to get skewed decisions which can really cause a mess. And so in financial planning is state planning, and this part, I'M gonna call it part of the estate plan, right, is that a good way to describe it? Yeah, it's a compliment. I wouldn't call it a part, it's a compliment to the estate plan. So it's again the practical, non legal things, including you can draft little letters to your loved ones. And what I've heard from people who have actually used this uh, they said that despite the inheritance that passed and the spoon collection, this book became a very valuable item because it was handwritten by their parents and it's a way for the parents to speak to the children and those left behind that they keep and it's a connection to the law the loved ones who have been lost. So it's a very interesting um not only tool to help during the administration process, but a vehicle, uh, for remembrance as well. You know, one of the things that we found my wife and I when we were you know, we did we did quite a lot of foster care and then we adopted three of our six kids. And with our birth kids, but even, I'll say especially with our with our foster kids and adoptive kids, we did my wife, my wife was better at than I was. We created this, this birth book and this Childhood Book, sort of a where I came from. And you know, they didn't air right when we were doing it. But depending on the maturity levels of of who we're talking about here, around, you know, usually around eleven or twelve for the girls, and use it a little bit older for the boys because, hey, we're just slower. Right. They began to question things and like where am I from? What? What? Why and everything else, and I look at this is maybe there's a there's a bit of a parallel, parallel or a corollary between that and what we're talking about here. Am I, because I mean I right on that absolutely, because, let's be honest. There's there's at least two things we all share in common as human beings, and that is we're born and we die. Now, birth is a celebratory event. Everybody likes it. There's lots of joy. It's creation. Death brings with it grief and sorrow and it's loss. You know, imagine and the teenager losing their cell phone. Oh my Gosh, you think the world was gonna end. Now think about losing a loved one. That's even a hundred times worse, although some teenagers I think losing the phone is worse than that. But the fact of the matter is it deals with a concept that is very important to have and you may not attribute a lot of importance to it while you're doing it, but when it's necessary to be used, having it prepared is just a huge step forward to handling that grief process. You know, let's Um. I think that is so true and I think it's an important point to bring up. Let's talk before we close out here. Let's talk about the title, because I really liked the title. Yes, it is what it is right, it's about me. How did how did you come up with that title? And Uh, I also want to touch on Um what I think could hold people back when they get...

...the book, because I'm hoping everybody listening to this gets this book because it's just worth there's no way you can see it's not worth it. Right just getting it and and using it as a gift to your family members is so important. But about me? What? Why the title? Sure, so, about three quarters of the way through the editing process we still didn't have a title and one evening I was driving home and I was trying to condense all of what the book was about into a two or three word title and I just came up with about me. And I came home told my wife, Hey, this book is about me, and she looks at it and says, who's going to want to read a book about you, Bob, and I said no, no, it's not about me, it's about the reader, and she says, I get it. So that's why the subtitle every thing you need to know when I've passed, this is truly about you. It's a way for you to leave information, important information about yourself, to your loved ones and those you leave behind, so that they know exactly what to do and who you were. You know, as I said, we have. The two things we have in common were born and we die. It's everything in between that brings color and uniqueness to us as human beings, and that's what this book is capturing, is that uniqueness that makes each of us who we are. So that's where the title came from, because it's just it's descriptive of what it is. This is about me, and if you walk into the office or a room of someone who's just recently passed and you see this book on the shelf about me, you're gonna be curious about what it's about and probably pull it out and all of a sudden all the information you need to administer estate is right there. Yeah, it's just I just I love the title. I love the idea of using it as a gift to your family members. And the one thing that I thought of as I was looking through the book that might be a pain point that I think let's just address it right now. So that sounds I read through this, number one, I get a little overwhelmed. Number two, this sounds just like boring, painful experience to go through. Let's just throw that out there, because the first thing that I did I was like, holy smokes, there's a lot of stuff that I never thought about that I need to go yeah, they're all so there's there's a little there's some work involved with this, but again, the best gifts are those that require work, not just like the Oh, I give you a gift card, like I know that's the thing to do now, but I would much rat get something that somebody has, you know, spent some real time on, either deciding that, hey, I know you that well, this is why I created this gift or bought this special gift that's specifically for you. I think that makes it that much more, that much more special to the person that you're gifting into. And the other thing that I found when I started, I started actually writing some actually I haven't finished, started writing out my my answers, and I found that I was actually enjoying it. Yeah, it's we wanted to make it comprehensive, to cover as many topics as we could, but we we wanted to prevent it from being overwhelming. So this is a go at your own pacebook. You know, maybe start on a page or two of one weekend and then maybe come back to it the next weekend and fill out another page or two and then maybe do some edits to it, you know, later on. So this isn't a sit down and do it all...

...in three hours, although I'm sure there are people who would be willing to do that. But it can be a go at your own pacebook and the you know, the more information you put in there, the easier administration is going to be and the easier time your loved ones are going to have. But again, it's all customizable and you could just put your name in the book, but you can also complete it with all the comprehensive data. So it's not about being overwhelmed, it's about making a decision to just get it done or just started. Because, listen, a decision to not do it is a decision in itself, just like, as we know, uh failure to plan as a plan to fail. So this is just one of those aspects of getting your house in order and making sure that what you're leaving behind is organized and the information is there and available right. Well, I'll leave everybody with this one quick tip about something like that too, for number one is getting started makes all the difference in the world. You'll never get anywhere unless you take the first step in doing it. UH number two. This this book can actually be a little bit fun. I found, you know, just thinking through this stuff is kind of fun and you think about the people who will be likely left behind and it's a pleasant thought, at least for me. Right. It's like I love my family, so I want them to know certain things that maybe we don't always talk about. Its right. That's right. So it can be fun. Every it's it's everybody's favorite topic, right themselves. True. And the other thing is the power of five. So let me just say this one thing. If you take schedule out US an egg timer, use your phone, use on old fashioned and flow up and watch the CNCOME through. You take five minutes, and this goes for any task that you're kind of like, I don't know if I want to do this. You just take five minutes of concentrated time, don't do anything else and do it. Number One, you'll get amazing amount done that you didn't realize you get done in five minutes. And you might also get to the point where, let's spend another five minutes doing this, because this is important and you begin to prioritize it more once you start use that power five. That's my that's my final little throw a little bit of value in there at the end. But again, this is Bob Kobasi, and again the best, number one, best way to get in touch with you is to go where Robert Kubasi DOT COM, R O B E R T K A B A C Y DOT COM. Also are Kubisi at Kel run K E L are you, and dot calm. That's my law firm. Email uh. And then you can pick up the book at Amazon, Barnes and noble, Beyond Word Dot Com. I also want to thank the publishers, beyond words, and the distributors, Simon and Schuster, as well as my editors and my spouse. They've all done a great job to get this out. There's a real team effort and we would just hope that people get the benefit from it, because if I can change and make one family better, I've done a good thing in this world, and so this is one family at a time and that's what my passion is about. Awesome, great. Well, it's been great to have you on the podcast. This is John Browning with building your life and not just your portfolio, and you can get in touch with me at Jay Browning, at advocacy, investing dot com. Send me a direct note or text the word life to one. You get all my information, including away to schedule some time with me, and...

...it's it's always free to chat. To chat with me. I'm happy to provide any value that I can. So, Bob, thanks again for being on the show and we will talk soon. Thank you. Money really is a big part of our lives and John Browning can help you and your family learn how to keep money in the proper perspective. It's important, but it's only a tool that can help you build the life that you want. If you'd like John Amelie a free copy of his book build a life, not a portfolio, go to John's website, Guardian Rock Wealth Dot com, and click the contact to US link and send your request. John Will Mel a copy of his book right to your door absolutely free. Thanks for listening to building your life podcast with John Browning. Be Sure to subscribe to this podcast so each new episode will be sent to you automagically when it's released. Have a terrific day. Nothing in this podcast should be construed as personal investment advice, and past performance is no guarantee of future results. Investing is not appropriate for everyone. There is a risk of loss associated with investing in the markets. No representation or implication is being made that using any methodology or system will generate profits or insure freedom from losses. Please remember that investing carries risk. Guardian Rock Wealth LLC and its affiliates are fiduciary investment advisors. Please consult with US or another experienced qualified investment advisor before making any investment decisions and or trying to implement any of the strategies and tactics we may discuss in any of our publications or podcasts.

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